~ To facilitate desire:
as women, in all walks of life, to be passionate about abandoning themselves
so that they can live in full surrender to God,
as married women, to be wives with a forever bride heart,
as mothers, to thrill at the stewardship of motherhood,
as keeper's of the home, to be full of joyful contentment, as women of God, joyful in their purpose and destiny, whatever that may be. ~ Part 3 of Hidden Valley Simplicity's blog purpose.
The entire purpose statement can be found here
and
Part 1 of this break-it-down series
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4aand
Part 1 of this break-it-down series
Part 2
Part 3
I've abandoned myself so that I may live in full surrender to God and yet, here is my canyon, in which many days, I remain mired in the muck of emotions that do everything but typify a bride's heart.
as married women, to be wives with a forever bride heart. . .
What was my heart like on my wedding day? That bride heart as I gazed as my husband, committing my life, my very soul, to him, anticipating a lifetime with him?
Hopes,
Desires,
Abandon to my groom,
Trust,
Love,
Utter devotion,
Pure happiness
Seeing only beauty,
Believing in him
Praying for the parts that concerned me
(instead of resenting)
A lifetime of commitment and partnership. The thrill of his face, the wonder of the band slipped on your finger, the wonder of his cupped hands around your face as he leaned in for that first kiss. Waking up and remembering, "I'm married. I'm a wife!"
How do we lose that?
The wolf comes howling at the door,
children demand attention
illness sabotages
jobs steal time.
We become complacent. We forget. We take for granted.
There are reminders if we would but choose to see them.
I was at a wedding this past weekend and I was reminded. The bride walked down the aisle, teary and glowing. Eyes only for her man. Anticipation of hope and trust captivating her face. We all saw it and those of us married, remembered.
Our hearts stretched in longing as our eyes followed her down the aisle. The romance of the ceremony stretched them even further. Spouses grabbed hands. One wife slipped her head to her husband's shoulder, looking wistful.
My man wasn't with me. I ached for his presence. I was incomplete, just as I was before we became one flesh. A piece of my heart was missing because we were apart.
The Bride's heart nudged me, asking for re-entry. I threw open the door and welcomed it gladly.
I returned home. To life. To bills. To issues we have to tackle. And the Bride's heart quickly lost it's footing. But this time I dug in a little more than I have and I hung on tighter than usual. I'm a bit more aware of how quickly is flees and I'm a bit more determined to force it to stick around.
He calls me his "forever Bride". . .
I don't want to be that in affectionate nickname only. I want to be that in spirit. Every week of every year. Every day of every week.
Not because I long for the exciting romance of new love. I truly enjoy this settled, familiar love we have. Those first years were so beautiful, but so very difficult. Learning how to deal with situations from our own unique perspectives. Adjusting to quirks that really didn't matter but were huge in our humanness. For me, learning to fully trust and allow him to fight for me as well as lead in the major decisions that needed to be made. For a control freak, hurt by many over a lifetime, it wasn't an easy transition for me to make, especially the trust him fully part. But it's easier now and it's that "easier" that I want to keep, even as I long for the Bride's heart part to take over.
No, it's not the blush of new romance I'm looking for. The fireworks. The fluttery stomach and racing heart.
It's the
Hopes,
Desires,
Abandon to my groom,
Trust,
Love,
Utter devotion,
Pure happiness
Seeing only beauty,
Believing in him
Praying for the parts that worried you
(instead of resenting)
A lifetime of commitment and partnership. The thrill of his face, the wonder of the band slipped on your finger, the wonder of his cupped hands around your face as he leaned in for that first kiss. Waking up and remembering, "I'm married. I'm a wife!"
I don't want to forget this gift I have. That I get to be his wife.
How do I find that forever Bride's heart?
By loving my Redeemer and by reveling in His love for me. When I gaze upon His beauty and see myself as He sees me, romance invades my heart, for
He. is. love.
He is my source. I can not create this bridal heart on my own, especially when life is becomes harsh and consuming. But when I turn to Love, I find beauty that transcends earthly time and circumstances. It is in that beauty of Him, when I lose myself to it, abandoning myself and surrendering to His perfect heart, that I find my forever Bride's heart.
